Friday, January 18, 2013

Special snowflake

No, this is has nothing to do with the forecast dusting of snow that's apparently heading in DC's direction tonight. This has more to do with me being a special snowflake.

So remember last week when I said that I realised a Stanley knife was called a Stanley knife because it was made by the Stanley corporation? Yeah. I've been having a lot of those moments since I got to the US.

1. We went to one of the headquarters of Goliath National Bank* earlier this week. When leaving, I went "Oh, they have a Goliath National Bank ATM in the foyer, that's nice and convenient for their staff!!". Yup. A bank having an ATM was surprising to me.

2. I got stuck in a toilet cubicle at Pentagon City shopping centre. The lock was kind of busted, so I have no one to blame but myself. But yeah. I got stuck. And had to yank the door from the top to get it open. And then obviously texted half of 20SB to tell them about it. General consensus? "BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA".

3. Also at Pentagon City shopping centre? I lost the subway station. There were signs everywhere pointing to the Metro. I still couldn't find it.

4. In an attempt to FIND the subway station, I followed a crowd of people all heading in the same direction. This took me about three blocks away from where I actually wanted to go, AND also led me to the middle of a car park. Well done, Kirsti. Well done.

5. Earlier this week, we went to Walmart. The number of times I had to walk up and down the baking aisle before I located the chocolate chips? FOUR.

6. I got a Kindle for Christmas. The number of times I push the 'next chapter' button instead of the 'next page' button? ASTONISHING. Do you have any idea how annoying it is to have to locate the page you were on when you do that?

7. We had a guy presenting to us the other day who was trying to give his presentation an Australian focus. So he mentioned ANZ, one of our big banks. Except that because he pronounced it Ay En Zee, it took me literally five minutes to work out that he was talking about ANZ (read: Ay En Zed).

8. I was watching the news before, which included the weather report. The weather reporter was like "And we're heading for a top of 49 degrees on Saturday". To which my response was "FORTY NINE FREAKING DEGREES?!?!?!? But I have no shorts or singlet top or thongs, and WAIT. They mean Fahrenheit, don't they..."

So...yeah. I'm clearly not going to need this any time soon:

Please tell me you guys have special snowflake moments too???

K xx

* name has been changed to protect the innocent from my idiocy.


  1. I have basically forgotten how to speak English - or anything coherently. I blame it on watching too much tennis and post match interviews with Tomic - seriously, that kid cannot put three words together coherently.

  2. You're definitely way more special than me right now. Although one time I was out on site and made the mistake of saying " where do you want me?" (meant in a purely innocent and literal way of course) over the radio with 40-odd earthworks operators listening in. I have never heard radio silence like it as forty men held their tongues *facepalm*


    I can't wait until you have special snowflake moment NEXT WEEK so I can point and laugh a little. You can laugh at me too. It's what friends do.

  4. So... for a minute I was all "OMG THERE'S REALLY A GOLIATH NATIONAL BANK????? I NEED TO FIND BARNEY STINSON." Yeah... it's that's kind of morning. ::face palm::

    1. I had the same thought. I was like, "Wait...what? GCB is REAL?!" Way to get me all excited only to destroy my hopes later, Kirsti. :P

  5. I've definitely had moments like that before. You would think I'd be able to think of one right now, because my life really is terribly awkward and full of moments like that, but it's Friday and I'm running on about 25 hours of sleep total for the week (when, in theory, I should get 24 hours in 3 days) so yea...brain's not functioning very well.

  6. today it took me seven tries to lock my friend's door.... *hangs head in shame*

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  8. Well I didn't follow the asterisk down and was like "isn't that the fake bank from HIMYM?" and 6 has happened to me except the analog version when I'm too clumsy to not drop the book I'm reading and have no idea which page I was on. Harder for me than most people since I refuse to let the spine bend and thusly make the book unpretty.

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