Friday, November 30, 2012

Hallelujah

It's Day 30 of NaBloPoMo!!! You know what that means? I DON'T HAVE TO WRITE A BLOG POST TOMORROW!!!!!!!!
Don't get me wrong, I love you guys like whoa. But between writing a blog post a day here AND two posts a week for Snark Squad? That's a lot of blogging. Especially when I'm trying to be a responsible adult as well and work/cook dinner/have something resembling a social life.

So yeah. I was going to make a vlog of me celebrating, but it's a millionty degrees outside and frankly? I CBF. So instead, let's throw a gif-y dance party with all of my favourite people:







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I'll be back on Monday. Have a good weekend, y'all.

K xx

PS. Someone remind me to PLAN AHEAD for NaBloPoMo next year???

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Ancient history, Volume XXXVII

Previously, ZOMG THE WORST BUS TRIP EVER.

Our first day in Panajachel, we did pretty much nothing. After the insanely long and complicated bus trip getting there, we just couldn't be arsed any more. So we wandered around the shops and had waffles for breakfast and played a nice game called Spot the Biggest Hippy You Can. Sara and I won with a dreadlocked hippy couple, both dressed in fisherman's pants, and the woman was breastfeeding their THREE YEAR OLD while walking down the street.

We also finally discovered something we'd been searching for throughout Central America. The holy grail of inappropriate snack foods:

Yeah. That's a thing. In case you're curious, it's like a chocolate eclair filled with chocolate custard. It was gross as well as racist. Although in all honesty, what else would you expect from a company with a name like this:


That night, we had a barbeque at the hotel. We hooked up Arizona Boy's computer so that we had music, which turned out to be a rather hilarious idea. The evening resulted in Waterproof Trousers and Irish getting more than a little drunk and singing Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" at the top of their lungs. There's a video, which has not gotten less funny with time. But I'm not going to include it for the sake of the innocent.

We also played Beer Pong, which didn't work out so well for anyone playing with me, because I don't drink beer, so they'd end up drinking twice as much as they otherwise would have. But eventually, we managed to lose the ping pong balls in the shrubs, so that idea got abandoned.

At one point during the evening, Sara went back to our room to get something. And in doing so, she managed to break off the key in the door. So when we went to bed that night, we couldn't shut the door properly because we wouldn't be able to get out again. So instead, we barricaded it with a table and our packs.

Ten minutes later, someone started banging on the door. It turned out to be a very drunk Arizona Boy, who wanted to apologise for the fact that he'd tried to scare us by hiding in the cupboard in our room. Except because he was drunk, he managed instead to hide in the empty room next door. And he didn't realise for HALF AN HOUR. Clearly, he's a smart cookie.

The next day, we went on a boat tour of Lake Atitlan. It was completely gorgeous, and included a 45 minute walk between a couple of villages:



Eventually, we reached a small village, and several of the boys took quite a shine to some VERY special local trousers. The trousers were very ornately embroidered with birds from mid-thigh down, and came in either white or mauve fabric with stripes running through it. Sadly, none of them purchased any of the very special trousers, because they were $100, but we DID take some photos so we could laugh hysterically later:

Next up, we head back to Antigua via the markets at Chichicastanango, and I nearly die. Seriously.

K xx

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

30 Days of Photography: Day 25

The theme for Day 25 was "something pink". I had half arsed plans to take photos of the twins, seeing as how they're small and pink and squishy and whatnot. But they're usually into their bedtime routine by the time I get home from interning, so there will be no photos of babies today (sorry Mum).

Instead, you can have this - a weird decorative cabbage planted in the garden of the fancy looking cottages at Sovereign Hill that I took during winter:

You're welcome, I guess??

K xx

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Me and makeup

I'm going to start by apologising to my minuscule number of male readers. Y'all are going to be bored today.

So it turns out that I follow quite a few fashion bloggers, people who are really into fashion and accessorising and make up and what have you.

If you know me personally, you're probably aware that I'm pretty much the complete opposite. About 75% of my clothes come from Target, I haven't been shopping since my birthday back in April (shopping for CLOTHES, that is. Shopping for sonic screwdrivers is a completely different thing!), I wear the same jewellery every day (because to not do so requires making decisions, and I suck at making decisions), and I have almost no make up. I didn't own ANY make up until I was fifteen, and I only ended up with any because of the year 10 formal.

So seeing as it's almost the end of NaBloPoMo, meaning that I'm running low on ideas, I figured I'd show you guys my make up collection. Are you ready?

This is my make up bag. It cost me $10 at Portmans.

And here are its contents:
Clinique Superbalanced Makeup in Petal. I only wear foundation on one of two types of occasion: 1. Going out somewhere fancy pants, and 2. Vlogging, in an attempt to look somewhat less pasty. As a result of this, I've only ever owned two bottles of foundation. I threw the first one out last year when a) I realised it was 13 years old, and b) I figured I should probably have vaguely decent foundation for the weddings I had to go to.  I foresee this bottle lasting me another ten years or so. (Yes, I'm aware that it's really bad to keep your make up that long. It hasn't killed me yet, so whatevs.)

Wet 'n' Wild Mega Liner. I bought it for $3 at a CVS in Boston last year. I suck at doing eyeliner, but this makes me look less like a panda than some I've used previously.

Covergirl Urban Basics eye shadow. It cost like $8. Apparently you can use it to create a "smoky eye" effect. I have very little idea what the fuck that means, let alone how to do it. So I just use the two in the middle. 

Clinique's High Impact mascara in black. I bought like five of these when I was in the US last year (Why, you ask? US price: $15. Australian price: $38.). And yes, I use black mascara rather than black-brown.

 Clinique Airbrush Concealer in...I have no freaking clue what, and I'm too lazy to go check. Exceptionally pasty, at any rate. It's great.

Clinique Almost Lipstick in Black Honey. It's the only lipstick I ever wear, and it barely even qualifies for the name. It's more like coloured gloss without the stickiness.

And that? Is literally it. The full contents of my make up bag. Total cost: about $100.

Which end of the spectrum do you fall into? The lots of products end? Or the "I can totally wear the same make up with every outfit" end??

K xx

Monday, November 26, 2012

Movie Mondays: Maverick


I first saw today's installment back in high school. I'd never even heard of it before, but I loved every second of it. Plus, it serves as a nice reminder that Mel Gibson wasn't always the bonkers douchecanoe he is today!
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Reasons why Maverick is awesome:
1. Mel Gibson. He's brilliant in this.
2. Maverick's donkey.
3. Alfred Molina. He's a fantastic bad guy.
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4. The lucky shirt.
5. Jodie Foster. She. Is. Hilarious.
6. The staged fight fifteen minutes in.
7. The soundtrack.
8. Grahame Greene. I think he's my favourite thing about this movie.
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9. The stage coach scene.
10. Conning everyone by speaking with the Native Americans in their language.
11. James Garner. He was the original Maverick, so it was only fitting that he make an appearance in this.
12. The costumes.
13. Danny Glover's cameo. PHENOMENAL.


14. The Russian archduke.
15. The bank robbery scene.
16. Maverick trying to chase his horse down in the desert while dragging a tree branch behind him with a wad of money in his mouth.
17. Picking the perfect card out of the deck.
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18. Conning the Russian archbuke out of $6,000.
19. Throwing cheaters overboard.
20. Maverick climbing from his room to the poker table.
21. When Annabel gets so excited about how many chips she's won that she falls off her chair.
22. The ending.

Plus, the following quotes:
- "Calm down, I don't want to go to bed with you, lady!" "Why not?" "Why...why not?? I'd be too frightened! God knows what parts of me you'd steal. I'd wake up with all sorts of things missing!"
- "I figure it's their fault for being on our land before we got here."
- "I could get back my wedding dress what I was going to have for when I found a husband!"
- "I suppose somebody ought to say something nice about the deceased." "How do you know he was nice? We don't know anything about him! The only thing he's got in his wallet is a bunch of names of whorehouses..."
- "I'm getting too old for this shit."
- "If I can't touch you, I can touch your shirt and dream."
- "From the moment I slapped eyes on this hombre, I smelled trouble. And refried beans."
- "Pa, this man wants to know if you want to buy a burro." "That burro aren't worth a dollar!" "Well, sir, I say you got yourself a deal."
- "Damned thing won't stay in the holster!"
- "I'd rather be rich than dead."
- "Oh, you sure do pick the spots!" "Yeah, I know. You know, the next time you people come and drive us off our land, I"m gonna find a nice piece of swamp that's so Godawful, maybe then you'll leave us the hell alone!"
- "Well, he don't eat much, but he's a regular jackass, and hee-haw hee-haw hee-halways likes to be called Arthur."

Have you seen it?

K xx

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Currently...

It's a millionty degrees at the moment (okay, that's a lie. It was 34 today, but it's due to be in the 30s every day this week, and EEEEEUW (America, that's in the mid-90s Fahrenheit)), and as a result, I shall quote Lolcats: I cannot brain today, I has the dumb.

So instead of thinking up a blog post, I figured I'd steal borrow an idea from Liz and do the 'currently' meme/blog post/thing.

Watching:
Right this second? Some documentary on the History Channel about Australian federation. I haven't really been watching a whole lot of TV since I got to Canberra, mostly because I've been going to bed at 10pm! I did go and see Skyfall last night with LB. I thoroughly enjoyed it - unlike Quantum of Solace, it actually had a plot (gasp)! I'm really looking forward to seeing where they take the Bond series in the future. Also, they showed the trailers for Les Miserables and The Hobbit, and I fangirl flailed in my chair, and wished Gina was there with me so we could squee together.

Listening to:
Mendelssohn's "Wedding March". It's playing on the documentary about federation. Also, crying babies. Babies do NOT like hot weather as it turns out. Interestingly, I've stopped using my iPod since I got to Canberra. I have no idea why. I think it's because the first day of my internship, I was wearing a skirt and didn't have a pocket to shove my iPod in. I'm not really missing it at the moment. Also also, one of the cats meowing in my ear. He snuck up behind me, the little urchin.

Planning:
My trip to the US in January. What I'm going to get people for Christmas (albeit in an incredibly half arsed way). Meet ups with friends before Christmas. What I'm going to do next weekend. Some baking. I don't know what or when, but it's been far too long since I baked any of my old favourites (namely brownies). My blog posts for the rest of November.

Thinking about:
My uni results. They're released tomorrow morning, and I'm kind of freaking out because for one subject I've only gotten a mark back for ONE assignment, so I have almost no idea how I've done. The email I just got from one of my uni friends in response to an email asking her where I could get a new brain because mine was full. Her reply? "573.86". I laughed far harder than it warranted. Librarians: we're big with the nerdy.

Looking forward to:
JANUARY!!!!!! Lor and Alice and Emmy and Gina and Eileen and Sarah in one month? I think I'm going to explode from the awesome. Seeing my BFF, Sara, in Florida. Les Miserables. The Hobbit. Seeing Pitch Perfect with Deidre. Knowing my results tomorrow. I HATE not knowing things, and am terribly impatient when it comes to things like this. Having ice cream for dessert. Christmas being over so I don't have to listen to the stupid songs any more.

Reading:
Cinder by Marissa Meyer. A cyborg retelling of Cinderella? YES PLEASE. I'm 26% done according to the Kindle, and I'm thoroughly enjoying it. I also just finished Patrick Ness' A Monster Calls. It was brilliant. I also have The Great Gatsby waiting in wings (I've never read it), but I've been reading so much YA in recent months that I'm not sure how I'll cope with it!

Making me happy:
The fact that I got a high distinction for my semester long group assignment. It was a LOT of work, and I'm thrilled that we pulled it off. Spending the weekend with friends. The fact that I'm not a total cripple after going to Body Step yesterday. I genuinely thought I would be. Playing with collection items at my internship tomorrow. Good friends, good food, good books, good movies.

How was your weekend?

K xx

Saturday, November 24, 2012

101 in 1001 #80

This morning, LB and I were up by 8.30am with intentions of heading to a 9.30am Pump class. But fate conspired against us, and we were informed that arriving at 9.32am was unacceptable and that we weren't allowed in.

So instead, we headed out to the Capital Region Farmers Market to pick up a couple of things, wander around and grab some breakfast. Conveniently, this crossed #80 off my Day Zero list - visit a farmers market!

It was pretty crowded, but lots of fun. There was a huge variety of stuff, from fresh pasta to flowers, from meat to macarons. There's a possibility that we each had a macaron as a pre-breakfast snack. They were delicious. They were huge as far as macarons go, so were a total bargain at $2.50 each!

After a bit more of a wander around, we stopped for breakfast at a Belgian creperie before going to eat our crepes outside in the shade. LB had the spiced apple crepe (I tried the filling - yuuuuuuuuuuum), and mine was strawberries and cream. The strawberries, unlike a lot of what's come out of the strawberry glut this year, were delicious. And the crepes themselves were cooked right in front of us. I briefly considered going back to get a second one, but restrained myself.


If I'd known that farmers markets came with delicious food stalls like this, I would have visited one much sooner!!

K xx

PS. LB and I made up for our failed attempt at going to Pump this morning with a Step class this afternoon. Since when does Step include tracks that require you to do jump squats across the step while holding a 2.5kg plate?!?! O.o

Friday, November 23, 2012

I can has sleepy times?

The first week of my placement is over, and I'm staying with LB and her fiance for the weekend. We have all sorts of things planned, like brownie making, and a trip to the movies, and a Pump class tomorrow morning.

But for now, I'm insanely tired and very much ready for a good night's sleep. Also, my brain exploded a little bit, because Paulie is on a billboard:

Seriously, you guys. WHUT. 

Hopefully tomorrow I will be less brain dead and have something more interesting to say. But for now, I'm planning on watching the rest of The Decoy Bride, then reading the rest of Patrick Ness's A Monster Calls and sleeping forever.

Here's hoping y'all have more exciting Friday nights ahead of you! 

K xx

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Ancient history, Volume XXXVI

Previously, flaming tequila shots, canyons and putting saints in the freezer.

The day after we learnt that St Anthony is the source of husbands was a travel day. According to our trip notes, we should "Be prepared for anything". And anything is pretty much what we got... 

We left San Cristobal on a local bus and headed towards the border. After a couple of hours, it was off the bus and onto a collectivo, which took us from the closest major town to the closest SMALL town. From there, it was into taxis, which took us to the Mexico-Guatemala border. After walking across the border, we crammed ourselves into tuk tuks (things that are not fun: trying to hold your 20kg pack with one hand while riding in a speeding tuk tuk.).

The tuk tuks dropped us on the side of the road where we waited around for a while before Arizona Boy suddenly announced that we were to board a chicken bus. After throwing our packs up on the roof (EXTRA fun), we crammed ourselves into the limited number of available seats and HOLY HELL, my knees still haven't forgiven me.

From there, it was onto ANOTHER chicken bus, and this one was sliiiiiightly more interesting, in that karma attacked Arizona Boy. The whole way through the trip, he'd been talking about how much he hated children. So of course, he got stuck sitting next to a small child. And said small child sat veeeeeeeeeery quietly for approximately half the bus ride, and then promptly projectile vomited all over himself and all over Arizona Boy's feet. And Arizona Boy was wearing thongs/flip flops/jandals. Said small child then looked enormously guilty, and shortly thereafter, slunk off the bus.

Sara and I, meanwhile, giggled hysterically. Because we're evil like that.

Shortly thereafter, we were off the chicken bus and standing around on the side of the road while Arizona Boy disappeared off into the depths of a small Guatemalan town looking for a hose to wash his feet. The plan had been to take another chicken bus, but the next bus to come along was a first class bus. We briefly got excited, until we realised that said first class bus was completely full, and that we would be standing in the aisle, holding onto the parcel shelves, all while wearing our packs. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

This experience was made even MORE enjoyable by the fact that the very overweight woman sitting next to where I was standing was passing the time on the bus trip by clipping her fingernails. And her fingernails kept HITTING ME IN THE ARM. FOR ABOUT A FREAKING HOUR. How she had any fingernails left to clip by the end of it is completely and utterly beyond me.

Eventually, we were off that bus, and onto yet another chicken bus for the trip down into Panajachel. And, just when we thought we were finished, we had to take tuk tuks from the bus station to the hotel. Thankfully, that wasn't very far.

Understandably, after AN ENTIRE DAY spent on nine (NINE!!!!) different forms of wheeled transport, we went slightly insane. And so, that evening after dinner, we decided that - considering it was pouring with rain and we didn't want to try and work out who would stay behind trying to hail another tuk tuk - we would cram all EIGHT of us into the one tuk tuk. Sara ended up on the parcel shelf, there were three of us in the back, two in the front, and two people sitting on laps. And then the driver. Who thought we were bonkers. It's entirely possible that we were:



Next time, the details of Panajachel. (Also, I promise there's no puking in the next installment.)

Also, happy Thanksgiving, America. And happy Thursday/Friday to everyone else!!

K xx

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Canberra update

So Canberra is going well. I'm learning tons at my placement, and getting up at 6.25 in the morning is surprisingly NOT killing me!

Other things that are happening:
  • The cats have stopped running away from me
  • The babies have stopped giving me the stink eye whenever I'm in their line of sight
  • I'm watching all manner of trashy TV (think Dance Moms and Toddlers and Tiaras), on account of I CAN.
  • I stole borrowed my mum's Kindle so that I don't have to carry a bunch of books around with me. It's very convenient, but having to turn the page twice as often is INCREDIBLY irritating. 
  • I have NOT missed Canberra's buses. Yesterday, a girl was talking on her phone and walked into the road without looking, and the bus driver had to slam on the brakes to not kill her, and a kid went flying into the front of the bus and had to be taken to hospital with potential broken ribs.
  • I fell over when the bus driver braked, but didn't injure myself on account of falling on other people. YAY.
  • Being a proper grown up makes me sleepy like whoa, and as a result, I've been in bed before 10.30 every night since I got here.
  • It seems like my hair REALLY likes Canberra water. I don't think my hair has been this smooth and shiny in years.
  • I HAVE ACCESS TO ZUCCHINI PUFFS AND PIDES AGAIN!!!!! Seriously, I don't think you guys entirely understand just how exciting this is. 
What's new with you guys?

K xx

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

30 Days of Photography: Day 24

The theme for Day 24 was 'animal'. I've been holding off on this one because I knew that once I got to Canberra, I'd have access to cats and therefore be able to take photos of something other than the manky birds in the front garden at home...

So here - meet Missy:

I don't think she was particularly impressed with me shoving a camera in her face...

K xx

Monday, November 19, 2012

Movie Monday: Stardust


You guys, I just finished the first day of my internship/work placements/thing, so I'm a little braindead. Apologies if this entire post ends up making no sense...

Today's installment is brilliant. Yes, it differs dramatically from the book (probably for the sake of the rating), but it's still completely fantastic.
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Reasons why Stardust is awesome:
1. It's Neil Gaiman. He's a genius.
2. Wheeeeeeeeee, secret worlds!!!
3. Claire Danes. She's fantastic.
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4. A cart pulled by goats!
5. Michelle Pfeiffer. There are no words for how brilliant she is in this.
6. A flying pirate ship.
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7. Tristan flying across the room on a chandelier cord.
8. The old man beating Tristan up when he tries to cross the wall.
9. Mark Strong.
10. Robert de Niro. Holy hell, he is my favourite thing about this movie. HANDS DOWN.
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11. It's written and directed by Matthew Vaughn, who also wrote and directed X-Men First Class.
12. Ricky Gervais. Apparently he ad libbed half his lines.
13. The ghost princes. They're brilliant.
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14. Ian McKellen is the narrator.
15. The voodoo doll of Septimus.
16. Charlie Cox.
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17. Yvaine bearing her soul to Mouse Tristan.
18. The coronation ceremony.
19. The witches' palace/house/thing.
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20. The ghosts giving a round of applause when the witch is defeated.

Plus, the following quotes:
- "Nothing says romance like the gift of an injured, kidnapped woman!"
- "You'd better be telling the truth, you two faced dog." "I can get you one of them, actually. Very good guard dogs. They can watch the back and the front door at the same time."
- "We're in the crater, this must be where it fell." "Yeah, this is where it fell. It is, or if you want to be really specific, up there is where this weird bloody necklace came out of nowhere and knocked it out of the heavens where it was minding its own business!"
- "I'd go to Africa and bring up back a diamond as big as your fist."
- "Murdered by pirates. Heart torn out and eaten. Meet Victoria. I can't decide which sounds more fun."
- "Yvaine, I have some lovely dresses, take your pick." "I'm fine." "Honey. You're wearing a bathrobe."
- "What do stars do? They shine."
- "A philosopher once asked 'Are we human because we gaze at the stars, or do we gaze at them because we're human?'. Pointless, really. 'Do they gaze back?' Now THAT'S a question."

Have you seen it? Do you love it? If not, why not?

K xx

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Airport o'clock

So I'm currently sitting in the lounge at Gate 5, Terminal 3, Melbourne Airport. I actually had grand plans for recording a vlog at the airport, a la John Green, but this plan went to hell when a) the airport was really busy, b) the gate my plane leaves from is opposite a cafe and people are apparently ALL about the coffee this afternoon, and c) the little announcements woman is on the loud speaker approximately every 30 seconds. Also, a small child just walked past me and yelled "I'M GOING TO DO A WEE!!!". So while that vlog would have been potentially hilarious, it also would have taken me approximately three hundred years to say anything even vaguely understandable, so no.

Anyway, I'm off to Canberra is approximately 25 minutes. I'm equal parts excited and apprehensive. Did you know that it's really hard to pack for a three week internship in a city where you'll be catching up with people and possibly going to the gym and staying in a house with twin five month olds? Because IT IS. So I'm stressing that I haven't packed enough shoes and that I've forgotten my toothbrush and that the airline will somehow lose my luggage in the next hour and I'll be forced to turn up at my internship tomorrow in skinny jeans, Cons and a three year old stripey t-shirt.

Also, despite the fact that I've been flying on the regular since I was a baby, I realised on the way to the airport that the last time I was on a plane was when I flew back from the US in October 2011, and now I'm having a small "Oh God, what if they've changed all the procedures and kick me off the plane for sneezing??" freak out.

Oh wait. The small child just walked past me again and yelled "WE'RE BACK FROM THE TOOOOOOOOOOOOILET!!". And his sisters are smooshing their faces against the windows and smearing them around. If they let them on the plane, clearly they'll let anyone on!

K xx

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Matryoshka suitcases

When I got home from class today (how was class, you ask? We got the itinerary for Washington, and when we were asked what the state bird of Virginia is, someone (not me) yelled out "MOCKINGJAY!!!!"), I had to get my suitcase down to pack for my flight for Canberra tomorrow.

And getting my suitcase down required braving The Cupboard of Suitcases and Travel Related Crap. In our house, this cupboard is in my bedroom, and it's about eight feet off the ground, which is more than a little inconvenient.

Also, we have a TON of suitcases. So they're all stacked inside each other.
Like this, only less awesome. Also, source.
Which means that in order to get to the specific suitcase I wanted, I had to remove the following from the cupboard:

  • My backpack from undergrad
  • My 60L pack, which leads to a face full of straps
  • A suitcase filled with a smaller suitcase filled with a bunch of travel sized junk (including a travel iron)
  • A suitcase filled with the suitcase I wanted, which was in turn filled with a smaller suitcase again. 
So as you can imagine, it was something of a long process. And THEN I had to do the whole thing in reverse, and do overhead shoulder presses with them while standing on a step ladder. To be honest, I'm impressed I didn't drop it all on my head/fall off the ladder! 

Sorry. This post sucks, but it's 10.47pm, I have a bellyful of pizza, and this is the best I could come up with. Also, I still haven't packed or written that blurb about my academic history like I was supposed to. WHOOPS.

K xx

Friday, November 16, 2012

Whoops...

There were things I should have been doing this afternoon and this evening. I have class all day tomorrow, I should probably have been doing some reading for that. I leave for Canberra on Sunday for a three week internship, I should have been packing. I have to write a 250 word thing about my academic background for my head of school to send one of the places we'll visit in Washington.

What did I do instead?

I ate ice cream and played Monopoly with Little Miss A. (Apparently Santa's not real and the presents are actually delivered by Jesus, did you know??) I helped her with reading the big words while she played Moshi Monsters. I had macaroni and cheese for dinner. Homemade, with a salad on the side. That makes it healthy, right???

I read two bedtime stories and sang about a thousand rounds of "On the Good Ship Lollipop" because it was that or "Away in a Manger", and it's FAR too early in the year for Christmas carols. Although there was a small snag involved when I couldn't remember half the lyrics to "On the Good Ship Lollipop", and had to fill in the gaps with "see a something something do a something something something big bad devil's food cake". (I was actually going to embed a video of Shirley Temple singing it in here, but I just watched it, and a six year old in a dress that barely covers her arse singing that song to a dozen adoring 30-something men creeped me out. So no.)

And now I'm watching Alias and wondering how the hell Sydney Bristow is able to function when she must spend at least half her life in a severe state of jetlag.

Oh, and I also acquired this nail polish from Revlon:

Because nothing says professionalism like purple glitter nail polish, right???

K xx

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Ancient history, Volume XXXV

Previously, archaeological sites, waterfalls, and Schrödinger's chicken.

First of all, this are going to get slightly more vague from this point on. Because I got so far behind with my travel diary that I just gave up altogether and figured I'd take bullet points on our trip notes and then write my travel diary when I got home. Four and a half years later, I still haven't bothered. So I'm going to be running on bullet points and my memory from here...

We left Palenque and caught a bus to San Cristobal de las Casas, which took approximately FOREVER. We finally arrived in San Cristobal at around 6pm, and had a quick look around town:


Then it was off to dinner at an all-you-can-eat steakhouse with a bullfighting theme. The boys were all "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY, STEAK!!" and proceeded to demolish approximately six or seven steaks each. I, on the other hand, had two steaks and, you know, VEGETABLES. After dinner, we had a DELIGHTFUL introduction to San Cristobal in the form of going to see a documentary about the Zapatista movement, which basically turned out to be a crapton of footage of dead bodies and people being executed... O.o

To calm(??) us all down afterwards, Arizona Boy took us to a bar, where we were presented with these:

Flaming tequila shots. I passed on mine, and ordered a strawberry daiquiri instead. Which, weirdly, was made with coconut milk. Oh, Mexico. Don't ever change.

The following day, we headed out for a boat tour of Sumidero Canyon. It's basically Mexico's version of the Grand Canyon, and it's pretty spectacular because it's in the middle of a rainforest:





CROCODILE

That afternoon, Sara and I visited the Amber Museum, which was...not particularly fascinating, and then climbed about a millionty steps to the San Cristobal Church, which has a nice view over the city.

Aaaaaand while we were there, we got swindled by small children. They claimed to be doing a school project, and that they'd been told to collect the names and countries of origin for passing tourists. Except the form they asked you to fill in included a box for "donation". I gave the kid five pesos on the basis that he knew the capital of Australia was Canberra.

The next day, we had another exciting excursion. This time, it was out to some nearby villages that have been excommunicated by the Pope.

Why, you ask? They took Catholicism and added in a bunch of elements from their traditional Mayan religious practices. Various saints are worshipped in preference to God or Jesus. The church has no pews, just pine branches all over the floor. And people go to church with the following: candles of varying colours, 2L bottles of Coke/Pepsi, flowers, eggs, and live chickens.

WHY do they go to church with these things? Well. The Coke/Pepsi makes you burp, and burping releases evil spirits (the richest guys in town? The Coke and Pepsi sales reps). The candles help you to specify what you're praying for. And the flowers/eggs/chickens are for drawing evil spirits out of you and then sacrificing. You ain't been to church until you've been to a church where chickens get their necks snapped, yo. Sometimes, they even do exorcisms in the church!

But my all time favourite thing I learnt while we were there? When the women of this town want a husband, they pray to a statue of St Anthony. If St Anthony fails to deliver a husband within a decent time frame, they take the statue, stand it on its head, and put it in the fridge as punishment. Genius!

Next up, we leave San Cristobal de las Casas for Panajachel, and it takes approximately a millionty buses and some permanent damage to my knees to get us there.

K xx
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