Monday, July 2, 2012

Movie Mondays: She's the Man


Okay. I fully acknowledge that today's movie is kind of terrible. But while it's terrible, it's also pretty bloody amazing. And I have a slightly bizarre level of love for it.
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Seriously, if you haven't seen She's the Man, you're missing out. Because Amanda Byrnes deserves an Oscar for her ridiculous facial expressions alone. 

Reasons why She's the Man is awesome:
1. Amanda Bynes. Sure, she's not the greatest actress on the planet, but she's pretty darned brilliant in this.
2. It made one of Shakespeare's less spectacular and more confusing plays into a completely hilarious movie.
3. Channing Tatum as Duke Orsino. He's kind of a terrible actor. But let's face it - no one's really paying attention to his acting abilities.
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4. Amanda Bynes' character, Viola. She's kind of a badass. She knows what she wants and she's not afraid to go after it, no matter how absurd the lengths. A better role model than Bella Swan? Uh, YES. (Okay, except for the starting fights part. But shhhhhh) 
5. Paul, Viola's hairdresser/partner in crime. He's pretty much an evil genius.
6. Vinnie Jones. I will watch practically any movie that has Vinnie Jones in it. Because he is SPECTACULAR. (Also? Check out his profile picture on IMDB. It pretty much sums him up.)
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7. Toby. He's hilarious.
8. The principal. ZOMG.
9. Duke with tampons stuck up his nose.
10. The moustache trying on montage.
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11. Monique. She may be a Grade A bitch, but the movie wouldn't be the same without her.
12. The mascots kicking each other during the fight at the soccer game.
13. Bicycle kicks. Totally show off-y and not really necessary, but still highly entertaining.
14. Duke's "the tarantula touched me!!" freak out dance.
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15. Eunice.
16. Viola's stupid ex-boyfriend, Justin.
17. The real Sebastian trying to play soccer.
18. Amanda Bynes' fantastic facial expressions. 
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19. Viola's mum.
20. The dream in which Viola has to play soccer in a giant puffy dress and everyone laughs at her.
21. Duke trying to be all nonchalant and then whacking his head on the gym equipment.
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Plus, the following (truly spectacular) quotes:
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- "Is it just me, or does this soccer game have more nudity than most?"
- "I just can't do this!" "Just remember, inside every girl, there's a boy. That came out wrong. But you know what I mean."
- "Mom, I will pick out my own dress. And no, I will not wear high heels. Because heels are a male invention designed to make women's butts look smaller...and to make it harder for them to run away."
- "And when I close my eyes, I see you for what you truly are, which is UUUUUUUUGLAY!!"
- "Is your sister hot?" "Uh...I guess so? She's got a great personality." "EW."
- "Are those real??" "Oh yeah, I'm growing sideburns now. NO!!"
- "What am I doing?? This isn't fun..."
- "Seriously, how old are you?" "I skipped a couple of grades. I'm brilliant. Shh!!"
- "[gets hit in groin with soccer ball. Guys all flinch] Oh. Right. OWWWW!! OH, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!! IT BUUUUURNS!!!!"
- "What do you think it's going to be like?" "It's going to be really special. She's just kissed about 300 guys at this point."
- "That's right. Didn't score on me last half, won't score on this half. I'm a ninja. Ninja goalie."
- "How come when I wanted to ask Eunice out everyone made fun of me, but then Sebastian likes her and suddenly she's cool? Screw you guys. I hate high school."
- "So, uh, you play the beautiful game, bros? Brothers? Brethren?"
- "Suck it up! Be a man and rub some dirt on it."
- "I can do this. I'm a dude. I'm a hunky dude. I'm a badass hunky dude!"
- "Just remind your brother how lucky he is to be in my life. And tell him to give me a call if he wants to stay in it, okay?" "Okay. Does he have your number? 1800-BEEYATCH?"
- "Quit blushing, that's laaaaaame." "Shut up, I'm not blushing."
- "Viola, darling. Remember - chew like you have a secret!"
- "Girls with asses like mine do not talk to boys with faces like yours."
- "Ask me if...I like cheese." "Um...okay. Do you...like cheese?" "Why, yes I do. My favourite's Gouda!"

Is your favourite Gouda, too? (Which is to say "do you have a bizarre love of this movie, like I do?")

K xx

14 comments:

  1. Although I may prefer havarti over gouda, I still love this movie. The Chef is completely in love with Amanda Bynes, so there was never any "if" about seeing this movie. It is one of those surprisingly enjoyable movies, though. If it's wrong to like it, then I don't care!

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    1. Honestly, I'm not a huge fan of gouda either. As I've stated previously, smoked cheese tastes like bonfire to me.

      ANYWAY. That sounds like the best possible outcome! I'm slightly terrified that one day, I'll grow out of ridiculous teen movies. I desperately hope it doesn't happen.

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  2. I have an inappropriate love for this movie. it's embarrassing for everyone.

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    Replies
    1. This makes me insanely happy, because when I mention that I love this movie, it usually ends in at least one person giving me a "WTF, you're insane" look.

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  3. I agree with everything you said. I always seem to.

    Still waiting for a movie I haven't seen and loved!

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    Replies
    1. Yay!! Although I now feel like I should try and find a movie that you haven't seen before...

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  4. I must see this movie now, if only because of the hilarious tarantula freak out dance. I mean, sure, I've seen snippets of the movie while channel surfing but never thought it was worth it. But now I've seen the light! YOU'VE shown me the light! I am blinded by the--

    Okay, shuttie-uppeth time.

    :P

    But first I must rewatch "Robin Hood: Men in Tights"!

    XOXO

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Seriously, you NEED to see this movie. It's so ridiculously and fantastically amazing.

      Also? I now have Blinded By The Light stuck in my head... I'm not sure if this is good or bad!

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  5. I love every Amanda Bynes movie, no matter how awful, including this one and Sydney White. I wish she would stop taking whatever drugs she is on, clean up her act and get back to making movies pronto.

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    1. For serious. I was SUPER thrilled when she unretired and was in Easy A. So yeah. She needs to sort her shit out and make movies again.

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  6. Replies
    1. Mmmmm, delicious cheesy goodness. (Both actual cheese, and the movie!)

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  7. I love this movie. A lot. I also love Twelfth Night, but this movie made me love Twelfth Night 10x more.

    In fact, I compared Twelfth Night, She's the Man, and another Indie film whose name I cannot remember at the moment for my Shakespeare paper senior year. Which basically means I assigned myself to watch She's the Man like...80 bajillion times during one semester. And it was awesome. I might have to watch this movie when I get home tonight.

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    1. That? IS AMAZING. I hope you got a fantastic grade for that assignment. Although even if you didn't, you still got to watch She's the Man 80 bajillion times, so you still win!! ;)

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