After watching the trailer for Les Miserables about a hundred times last week, I realised that the last thing I watched starring Russell Crowe was the last half hour of A Beautiful Mind. And before that, it was Robin Hood. Which was, let's face it, pretty awful.
So I decided to rectify this immediately.
Yup, Gladiator. Considering I'm a massive history nerd, it's not particularly surprising that I LOVE this movie. It doesn't help that it's got an all star cast, a kick-ass story, and some truly spectacular dialogue! Okay, so it's RIFE with historical inaccuracies. Like the fact that Commodus was Emperor for 12 years rather than about 15 minutes. But he does seem to have been totally bonkers, and he did like to pretend he was a gladiator and fight in the arena, and he was murdered, so.......... There's that?
Reasons why Gladiator is awesome:
1. Russell Crowe. He didn't win the Best Actor Oscar for this role for nothing!
3. DOUBLE HANDED DECAPITATION BY SWORD!!!
4. Joaquin Phoenix. So creepy. So brilliant. So very very disturbing...
6. How it shows off so many different bits of the Roman Empire - Africa, Spain, Italy, Germany.
7. Richard Harris. How can you not love Richard Harris????
|Hello, Dumbledore. Also, source.|
9. The final fight between Maximus and Commodus. There's this element of "Haha, Commodus. You may have years of training, but there's a difference between drills and fighting an accomplished soldier. Enjoy that headbutt!" to the whole thing.
10. Connie Nielsen. She's amazing as Lucilla, who's such a fantastically strong character.
12. Rewriting the Battle of Carthage by working together to kick arse.
13. Oliver Reed. The last movie he ever made. And Proximo is hilariously awesome.
15. It won five Oscars, and was nominated for another seven.
16. Djimon Hounsou. In so many ways, it's his character that keeps Maximus alive.
18. Omid Djilali as the slave trader. I basically love him in everything I've seen him in. This is no exception.
19. Rome. Sure, it's computer generated. But you have to admit, it's still amazing.
21. Hagen, the big German gladiator dude. He's kind of great.
22. I get to yell "Hey, look! Lorica segmentata!!" at the screen. (I know, I'm a nerd. Shut up.)
|This is lorica segmentata. The soldiers are wearing it at the battle in Germania. Also, source.|
24. I LOVE that they included the awnings around the top of the Colosseum. Did you know that they used sailors to man them?
25. The fight between Maximus and Titus of Gaul. Wheeeee, surprise tigers!
27. Seriously, can someone just get me a job as an historical researcher/advisor for movies already?? Please?
28. The scene where Lucius steps forward with the men to help carry Maximus from the Colosseum. *sob*
Plus, as always, the following quotes:
- "What we do in life echoes in eternity."
- "It vexes me. I'm terribly vexed."
- "We mortals are but shadows and dust."
- "I will see you again. But not yet...not yet..."
- "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED???"
- "The beating heart of Rome is not the marble of the Senate, it's the sand of the Colosseum. He'll bring them death and they will love him for it."
- "Is Rome worth one good man's life? We believed it once. Make us believe it again. He was a soldier of Rome. Honour him."
- "Win the crowd, and you will win your freedom."
- "When a man sees his end, he wants to know there was some purpose to his life."
- "At my signal, unleash Hell."
- "Busy. Little. Bee."
- "If only you had been born a man. What a Caesar you would have made."
- "Today, I saw a slave become more powerful than the Emperor of Rome."
- "Those giraffes you sold me, they won't mate. They just walk around, eating and not mating. You sold me queer giraffes. I want my money back."
- "If you find yourself alone, riding in the green fields with the sun on your face, do not be troubled. For you are in Elysium and you're already dead!"
- "The general who became a slave. The slave who became a gladiator. The gladiator who defied an emperor."
- "My name is Gladiator."
- "Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back."
- "My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life, or the next."
So. Thoughts? Do you love it? Hate it? Find it really long? Cry every time you watch it like I do? Quote it far more than you should, also like I do? I MUST HAVE ANSWERS!! Please?