Monday, February 13, 2012

Movie Mondays: The Return of the King

And so we finally come to my favourite installment of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Stuff happens! There's an army of ghosts! And Frodo gets all possessed by the ring and therefore becomes infinitely more interesting! Plus, EAGLES.
On with the show!

Reasons why The Return of the King is awesome:
1. Smeagol's backstory.
2. Sam's shadow scaring off orcs because they think he's a huge warrior dude.
3. Everyone kneeling to the four hobbits at the end. *sob*
4. Gandalf sleeping with his eyes open. It's kind of hilarious.
6. Minas Tirith. It's a pretty badass city, even if it's run by a total nutcase.
7. The Dead City. It's all green and glowy and stuff.
8. Pippin lighting the beacon of Minas Tirith and being all smug before having an "Oh shit, I just set fire to what I'm standing on" moment.
9. That the orc army marching out of the Dead City kind of look like a mob of angry villagers off to storm Dracula's castle. (Or is this one just me?!)
10. Poor Faramir. He's awesome, and his father just basically goes "You know what, you should have died instead of your brother. Could you go fix that now? Kthxbai."
He looks like a kicked puppy. Also, source
11. Merry riding out on a pony with Rohan's army.
12. That Sam gets up and keeps going when Frodo leaves with Gollum.
13. Pippin singing to the Steward of Gondor as Faramir and his men are riding into battle. Completely heartbreaking.

14. Aragorn drawing Isildor's repaired sword.
15. The creepy ghost army. They're pretty brilliant.
16. The orc leader side stepping a giant piece of catapulted masonry.
17. Gandalf using his staff to kill orcs.
18. Sam fighting Shelob, the giant creepy spider.
19. The wolf's head battering ram that breathes fire.
20. Pippin saving Faramir's life.
21. Eowyn hamstringing oliphaunts. She's much cooler than Arwen who basically lies around on a sofa.
22. Gandalf's expression when Sauron's tower falls.
23. Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli arriving with the dead army.
24. The ridiculous beaked helmet Frodo wears in Mordor.
25. Gollum's gleeful expression when he gets the ring back.
26. The crown of Gondor. Pretty sure all royalty should wear crowns like that rather that stupid heavy jewelled things.
27. Pippin catching the bouquet at Sam's wedding.
28. Eowyn and Merry killing the Witch King.
29. Legolas killing an oliphaunt.
30. According to IMDb, it has an on screen body count of 836. That's pretty epic.

Plus, the following quotes:
- "That still only counts as one!"
- "The salted pork is particularly good!"
- "Run, Shadowfax. Show us the meaning of haste."
- "The beacons of Minas Tirith! The beacons are lit. Gondor calls for aid!" [massive pause] "And Rohan will answer."
- "The age of men is over. The time of the orc has come."
- "Certainty of death, SMALL chance of success... What are we waiting for??"
- "Hold your ground, hold your ground! Sons of Gondor, of brothers! I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me. A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of friendship, but it is not this day. An hour of woes and shattered shields, when the age of men comes crashing down. But it is not this day! This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good earth, I bid you - STAND, MEN OF THE WEST!"
- "I do not fear death."
- "You fool. No man can kill me. Die now." "I am no man!"
- "Never thought I'd die fighting side by side with an elf." "What about side by side with a friend?" "Aye. I could do that."
- "My friends. You bow to no one."
- "It's so quiet." "It's the deep breath before the plunge." "I don't want to be in a battle. But waiting on the edge of one I can't escape is even worse."
- "Of all the inquisitive hobbits, Peregrin Took, you are the worst."
- "From the ashes, a fire shall be woken. A light from the shadow shall spring. Renewed shall be blade that was broken. The crownless again shall be king."
- "Release us." "Bad idea. Very handy in a tight spot, these lads, despite the fact that they're dead."
- "I can't carry it for you. But I can carry YOU!"
- "For Frodo."
- "Death is just another path. One that we all must take."
- "I'm glad to be with you, Samwise Gamgee. Here at the end of all things."

I promise I'll find something less nerdy, less epic and more hilarious for next week!

K xx


  1. This is another one of those movies that makes me cry uncontrollably every single time I watch it. And I am not ashamed.

    1. Right there with you. Although I do have to admit that I wished it ended with Aragorn's coronation rather than boarding the ship to sail into the west...

  2. This is the first movie that ever made me cry. Just... UGH it's so heart-wrenching! I love Return of the King. In my Sunday School class we'll be starting it in a few weeks and I'm probably going to have to hide my face the whole time so the kids don't see me crying. haha. SHORT PEOPLE ROCK!

    1. Wait, this is the FIRST movie that ever made you cry?? Maybe I'm a giant wuss, but 7 year old me was a WRECK during Milo & Otis. And that was just the beginning!

  3. Yay for movie nights! :) It sounds like you had a great time.
    Twitter: @GlamKitten88

  4. I love this movie.I need to watch it again. It's been way too long.

    1. I really need to track down the extended editions one of these days. Because I've only ever seen the cinematic releases.

  5. I get all the Lord of the Rings movies mixed up together. I'm not sure if this part is in the Return of the King but my favorite movie is the one where Legolas slides down the stairs and starts fuckin people up with arrows.

    Love him.

    I played Lord of the Rings online for a while. I was kind of addicted. I want to start playing again but I liked it better when my boyfriend and I could play together.

    1. That's in Two Towers. It may not be my favourite movie, but that IS my favourite scene from the entire trilogy. You really can't go past badass Legolas sliding down the stairs on a shield!

      I'm super excited about the LOTR Lego that's coming out at the end of the year. Mostly because I'm expecting them to release a Wii game!

  6. I must admit that I haven't seen this one (or possibly the second one?) they are too violent for me! I'm a delicate flower :)

    I'm SOOOOO excited for the Hobbit though.

    1. Oh, DEIDRE. What *am* I going to do with you?!

      Also? We should see The Hobbit together!!

  7. Strongly agree with no 21. Eowen would totally beat Arwen at an arm wrestle!

  8. I finally got my husband to watch LOTR this week. We just moved and didn't have cable or internet so Tuesday night we watched The Fellowship of the Ring. Wednesday the cable and internet people came and I was pleasantly surprised that he wanted to watch The Two Towers anyway, and last night we finished the trilogy. He calls me a nerd, but I know he loved them.


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