Saturday, January 22, 2011

Fieldwork lessons 2

I've been in Portland for the last few days on another photography expedition. We also had to collect some rocks that are going to be used in the gallery. And once again, fieldwork has taught me a couple of things:

1. Tiny planes have really low roofs. Ow.
2. The security checks at tiny airports consist of "Do you have any sharp objects? No? Great!"
3. Co-pilots with pimples and bum fluff on their chins? Not reassuring in the slightest.
4. If a tiny plane is scheduled to take an hour and a half to get somewhere that takes four hours to drive, it's not because the tiny plane goes really slowly. It's because it goes via Hamilton, something that isn't on the itinerary.
5. Don't watch Fox 8 first thing in the morning. You'll get sucked into a Futurama/Family Guy/Simpsons session and end up running horribly late.
6. Don't wear Converse on fieldwork. You'll end up having to trek through a partially flooded cow paddock and stand on something that SEEMS like solid-ish mud, but is actually a crust of mud with squelchy, watery grossness underneath. Which leads to this:

7. I love my shiny new 55-300mm lens (okay, I knew that one already. Whatever):

8. ALWAYS wear sunscreen. Sure, I should have known this one. But for some reason it didn't occur to me, and now I'm a delightful shade of beetroot.
9. Half of Portland is named after the Hentys. Not surprising, considering the Hentys founded Portland, and therefore probably named half of it after themselves in the first place...
10. A 50m roll of bubble wrap is rather large. Also? It's perforated. Awesome...
11. Posting a 5kg rock from Portland to Canberra will set you back $15.
12. If I lived in a country town, I would a) go insane, and b) be the size of a house from eating nothing but doughnuts from the local bakery.
13. The Mexican schnitzel with chips and salad at the Bridgewater Bay Beach Cafe is delicious. The view ain't too shabby either!

14. Watch out for small dogs when packing six large rocks in bubble wrap and plastic boxes. They may run up and pee on the stack of boxes just when you've finished putting the last of the lids on...
15. Week old bull terrier puppies are *seriously* fugly. I mean, bull terriers are fugly at the best of times. But when they're a week old and haven't opened their eyes yet? They just roll in their own shit and bear a striking resemblance to rats... *shudder*
16. A pub crawl in Portland isn't nearly as impressive as it sounds. Cos there's only about three pubs in town!
17. Waking up at 6.45am with the 'See My Vest' song from the Simpsons stuck in your head on a Saturday morning is incredibly irritating, despite how catchy it is...

K xx

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